Carol Ann Esposito Obituary (1944 - 2020)

Carol Ann Esposito (nee Garlati), beloved mother and wife, passed away on April 3rd, 2020. She was 75. Born at Holy Name Hospital on May 20, 1944 to Joseph and Mary Michalena Garlati, she was named after the actress Carol Lombard by her mother (who was a lover of movies, and worked with Joseph in the film industry). She grew-up in Cliffside Park and Palisades Park, living with various members of her immediate and extended family over the years. Carol described her childhood as being wonderful. She loved both her parents, and was particularly close with her father, whom she admired. As a young girl she spent considerable time playing with her friends from the neighborhood, an area she described as being ethnically mixed. It was also an era when Italian-Americans spent a lot of time with extended family members, which provided Carol many shared experiences with her aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins. This significant time together gave rise to a deep loyalty to her family, which would endure the rest of her life. She graduated Cliffside Park High School in 1962. After graduation, Carol married Bernardo Vincenzo Esposito on February 16th, 1964, at Epiphany Church in Cliffside Park. They had met in high school, with her future husband telling his friend upon first seeing the young Ms. Garlati: "Sam, I am going to marry that girl." Early in their marriage they moved into "the House" at 256 Hudson Place in Cliffside Park, where they would live for over 40 years along with Bernardo's parents, his sister, and his sister's family. During those years together, and in their 900 square-foot section of the home, Carol and Bernie had 3 children together: Anthony J, Christine, and Joseph C Esposito. Carol started working regularly in 1975, mostly full-time, and continued doing so for approximately 40 years at various firms in NJ. Her primary occupation, however, was the raising of her 3 children. She was a truly remarkable mother, whose children adored her throughout their lives. Carol protected, instructed, patiently guided, and above-all loved the 3 of them dearly. While she communicated her wisdom, love, & guidance to her children directly, many of Carol's most powerful lessons were delivered by example. She lived it. She walked the walk. Whether it was the Sunday or holiday dinners she hosted with her husband, the safe refuge and patient ear she provided all the generations that followed hers, the doting care she bestowed upon her grandchildren, or the time spent helping those in heated disagreements to consider a different point-of-view, Carol played an indispensable role bringing peace, equanimity, and love into the lives of her family. She was truly a class-act, astutely discerning when to share her (many!) opinions and when to withhold them. The woman was unquestionably a matriarch-in-full: superbly managing the household, while preserving & nurturing the overall environment. And she did all this while completely transforming her own life. Whether it was the acceptance of Jesus Christ as her savior & Lord, her own amazing health transformation, her voracious reading, her determined, successful (and completely self-educated) stewardship of the family's finances, or her deeply personal journey over the years towards greater self-assertion and self-reliance, Carol had the courage to keep changing. Through her resolve she steadily expanded her capabilities and grew her sense-of-self, while maintaining whole her core of love, laughter, and generosity. Her character radiated; her integrity inspired. And she never shied from becoming. She was beautiful. To everyone who knew her: family members, friends, colleagues, fellow volunteers at the hospital or food bank, Carol was present. When she was there, "she was there." It was, perhaps, her greatest superpower: the woman was not distracted with other concerns or people when someone spoke to her. Carol would be fully-engaged in the moment, and generous with her attention as she listened. And when she did speak, good heavens: the woman had a clarion voice and gorgeous laugh that would fill a room! Indeed, Carol could often be heard sharing tales of her various (mis)adventures...and always did so with her beautiful smile & that knowing, humorous glint. Her face lit up as she shared these stories, and her entire being would animate. Every room Carol Esposito was in, was better because of her presence. And she never stopped serving the people in her life. For those reasons and more, including the incredible love, devotion, & admiration she engendered, Carol is and will continue to be greatly missed by those who were blessed to know her. Carol is survived by her husband Bernardo, son Anthony and daughter-in-law Kelly, daughter Christine and son-in-law Eric, son Joseph, grandson Robert & granddaughter-in-law Samantha, granddaughter Kaitlin, grandson AJ, sister Claire, nieces Dina and Marianne, nephews Tommy and John, cousin Jennifer, as well as many other cousins, second-cousins, great-nieces, and great-nephews who loved her. In lieu of flowers, Carol would have been pleased to see donations directed to the following organizations: Shriners Hospitals for Children; the Arbor Day Foundation; the Southern Poverty Law Center.